Missed It. Dammit.

All month, I'd been stalking my neighbors' front yard, 

eager to see what they might install as 

their Halloween yard decor.

All month I was disappointed because no magic

transformations had appeared. 

Well, a new deck had been added to the back 

of the house, so I figured their attentions

had been applied there instead.

Wrong!

This morning I left to walk to the store to find 

that this scene had been created.

I wish I could have seen it last night, 

lit in all its macabre glory.

In addition to the skeleton driving the old car,

there is a skeleton cat on the window, 

a giant-ass spider perched on the corner of the porch, 

and, just possibly, a yucky effigy of our

state's narrow-minded governor being squished 

under the car. Bwa-ha-ha-hah!

On the other side of the front yard, they had parked 

one of their cars. Since it is just the right

shade of "Exorcist" green, it fit the theme.

I wondered what role it played Halloween night

and was sorry I missed whatever

drama it had been assigned. 

Halloween's Day Job

They gotta go somewhere, right?

If they don't head for a crypt just before sunrise,

or go stir a cauldron at the school cafeteria,

I figure the others must have gotten jobs as models

for the anatomy classes at IUPUI.

I was startled the first time I saw these,

all sizes and variations, in a classroom just off

the main pool at the Natatorium.

Shoot, they're definitely qualified for the task;

the ones in the back have hinged lids

on their skulls, while the beauty in front

has numerical tats on her many parts.

(Musta been a pole dancer in a past life!)

Woohoo! 

Where the Good Candy Lives

The word from the homeowner is that any little 

trick'r'treater who makes it past the ghouls, goblins, 

and spiders in this Halloween display will 

get a full size candy bar.

The haunting will begin around seven o'clock 

Halloween night, and continue until 

the stream of kids dies down. This home,

at the corner of Hollister Drive and 21st Place,

just off High School Road, has really been

dressed for the occasion.

The owners are looking forward to sharing

their handiwork with the visitors. 

Frosty's Green , Umm, Appendage

This window decoration went up not long after Halloween,

so it seems appropriate that Frosty looks as though 

he's being attacked and strangled by a giant green dick.

Goose Dressing

A while back, oh, twenty-five years ago or so, cement geese 

were the thing to have as a part of your yard decor, 

especially on the front porch. Many homeowners dressed

their geese according to the seasons. They still do.

This Speedway resident adapted a toddler's Halloween

costume to fit her yard mascot. There are a few witches and

even a Frankengoose to be seen in other yards.

For the past couple years, plastic cadavers and body parts

can be seen emerging from front lawns.

There should be a broom sticking from the nether regions 

of this witch, who evidently lost altitude during a test run, and

did a face plant at a home a couple blocks  from my place. 

I figure someone tampered with the evidence 

to use the broom for their own 

Trick-or-Treat ride Halloween night.

Be Afraid ... Be Very Afraid

Beware ... 

the Night of the Zombie Puppies!

Spawn from the League of Cujo are out on the streets!

With their glassy-eyed stares of cuteness, 

they come to get you, tantalizing you with their 

incessant furry wiggles, happy tails and 

continual yelps of eerie joy. 

They know you will not be able to resist.

You must give in, you must and you will be trampled 

in their midst, run over as they make for their next victim. 

They will not stop, not even to give a brief lick from their tongues 

as they rampage through the night. Because ... 

The Zombie Puppies are out to avenge all those of their

species who've had to endure names like Cuddles, Sweet'ums, 

Sugar and made to wear costumes such as the ones below...

Borrowed from Petnet.com 

 Borrowed from Petco.com

Boo!

Oooooo ...

This poor skeleton twists in the wind, his hands crossed over his crotch, 

fraught with his bony nekkidness. The jack o'lantern, 

comfortable on the swing, laughs at Bones' discomfiture.

It appears things are as they should be as All Hallows Eve approaches.

'Tis the Season

The neighborhood is beginning to break out in Halloween decorations.

In this yard, St. Francis, the protector of little animals, looks to be a mite

 pissed that his caretakers have dressed him in a pumpkin suit.

Ol' Frank looks like he wants nuthin' better than to chunk that punkin'

and get back to pettin' bunnies and comforting doves.

The little bird whispering in his ear is telling Frank he's a real saint

for putting up with that orange strait jacket. 

Take a Walk Around the Block ...

... but beware of the flying Rottweiler.

Aack! And the screaming, naked monkeys!!!

This house must offer the best treats at Halloween,

but only if you are brave enough

to walk past the welcoming committee.

I prefer little, tiny birdhouses.